Welcome. Take off your shoes and get comfortable.
I’ve decided that I’ll let you in on a little secret. (Deep breath…) I’ve been a character actor in my own life for 17,703 days. I remember, as a little girl, having more wealthy friends tell me how lucky I was to tag along in their life. When I joined the Junior League, someone wondered (aloud and in front of me) who “pulled the strings.” Even in my family. An impending visit from someone else might trigger a banana pudding. But when I visit, making a list of chores has been customary. I was the go-to gal when someone couldn't pay full price (or at all) for a service they needed performed. And now as an adult and, geographically speaking, “new girl” I’ve been absolutely gobsmacked by the amount of who-the-f-does-she-think-she-is energy. But I’m not going to regret any of that. Ever. I love being supportive to the people around me. And, I want to be transparent, that does come with a healthy dose of “people are using your good nature against you, Ashley.” But I won't have much time for that any more. Because I’ve decided to accept another role - the lead. Yes. Today I’m writing to announce that I have been offered top billing. And I took it!
My casting agent? The Brilliant … Becca Bloom.
Last week, last month, or last year - at this point I couldn't say for sure, I tumbled into the burrow of an unorthodox influencer. And hooo-honey, she delivers the goods! The Van Cleef draped, Judith Leiber hot dog toting, professional diamond solitaire lifter ... is somewhat rightfully being compared to Marie Antoinette. In (I’ll give it) striking similarity if you distill some of the coincidences of context. And the very first thing I can tell you is that she gives the likes of the Kartrashians a run for their (quite literal) money. This isn’t spackled-together riche. It’ s an accurate snapshot of considerable wealth. And I'm here for it. Pookie, on the other hand, is probably packing all that Hermes into her Honda Pilot as we speak so Daddy Fang can’t hawk it. I digress. IYKYK. I’m not a big fan of "luxury" (emphasis on the quotes am-I-right?) influencer culture. I typically go for the Mom who’s down 255 pounds and wants to share her Chick-fil-A order. Or the middle aged darling who is building her interior design business one room in her own home at a time while working part time at the Hallmark store.
So how did I discover Becca? Because I’m fvcking magical that’s how. See how easy it is to step into that energy? Kidding. In all seriousness arriving at this particular spot almost killed me. But the view is fricking fantastic!
And how did Becca cast me in this new role? Well. I will say it was entirely unintentional. She was her. Breathtakingly so. But I saw me. And in this life, there is nothing more precious than a human who is gifted enough to hold up a mirror for you. Want to get to know us? Ok!
 |
Ladies like us ......... |
Love a magnifying glass. Lady Detectives through and through, the game is nearly always afoot. We know that “scientific lab coats” are made by the likes of Brooks Brothers and come in satin piped Terry cloth that is cinched at the waist. We are forever ballerinas who are also v. good at mathing. (My AP Calculus group thought I was in the wrong exam room because I just “got” it and didn’t ever have to go to class.) We have an incredible work ethic and we respect the opportunities we’re given. Girl’s girls! We’re not going to let somebody’s crusty son get away with disrespecting you. Love to punctuate a moment with a Jellycat? You bet your sweet peach we do! We don’t overcomplicate things and love a chance to simplify a concept for others. Romance = Science. Twenty four hours in New York? Don’t knock it till you try it. That right there is a portal to another dimension and I’m not even sorta kidding. I have done it often.
You may find a rock collection in our purse. What? I said “we stay rooted” at the very beginning. We collect. For Becca: jewelry, sculptural handbags, and clothing. For me? Feathers, books, Limoges, and tiny white porcelain swans. We stay calm in stressful situations. Nobody at this table is scared of an elaborate invitation!
We are Issey Miyaki wearing, binocular toting, hot dog loving, long term greedy gals. We understand if our Mother’s fortune teller tells us not to buy a house. We get it. We’re not buying that house. We choose our battles. Easily offended is easily manipulated. In the evening, you’ll most likely find us in Dior pajamas. Mine were my paternal Grandmother’s. We’d rather skip the after party to watch Love on the Spectrum. Speaking of LOVE… those (blushes) *secret Japanese enzymes* tho. We are up for a goldfish funeral, a friend celebrating 30 days no-contact with an ex, or a cat birthday but completely allergic to idiots. I’m certain that there are so many differences between Ashley Smith and Becca Bloom. But aren’t our likenesses so much more interesting?
I suppose, if I came here to say anything, that sentence right up there is it.
Mothers Day, typically a complicated day for me, was a dream. The Mister made breakfast. I met up with The J’s for pedicures. Got silly with Little J in TJ Maxx. Had a brilliant Dinner at George’s Lowcountry Table. And watched Throw Mama From The Train - his Mother’s request. They are ... two sweet peas.
I started to call it irony that Becca was the one who gave me this little enormous nudge. But I don’t want to rob her of her influence. No not that kind. The other influence: depth of character paired with sparkling intellect.
All of my Gratitude B. Xo, A
You may find a rock collection in our purse. What? I said “we stay rooted” at the very beginning. We collect. For Becca: jewelry, sculptural handbags, and clothing. For me? Feathers, books, Limoges, and tiny white porcelain swans. We stay calm in stressful situations. Nobody at this table is scared of an elaborate invitation!
Of COURSE she uses oysters as a ring dish.
Can you say Doppelgänger??? JkJkJk
Photo: Becca Bloom's TikTok
I suppose, if I came here to say anything, that sentence right up there is it.
Mothers Day, typically a complicated day for me, was a dream. The Mister made breakfast. I met up with The J’s for pedicures. Got silly with Little J in TJ Maxx. Had a brilliant Dinner at George’s Lowcountry Table. And watched Throw Mama From The Train - his Mother’s request. They are ... two sweet peas.
I started to call it irony that Becca was the one who gave me this little enormous nudge. But I don’t want to rob her of her influence. No not that kind. The other influence: depth of character paired with sparkling intellect.
All of my Gratitude B. Xo, A
No comments:
Post a Comment