11 Things You May Not Know ...

"Do something that scares you today," she said. I did, on TikTok, I SAID IT! I shared a video from SXSW when I interviewed H.E.R. on the red carpet. But what the video doesn't capture, is how elegantly Gabriella helped ground me. (I was shaking like a leaf - it was my first time!) And how brilliantly she empowered me to embrace my fear. It wasn't necessarily something that could be captured on film. It was somehow both ephemeral and deeply palpable at once. But I'm quite certain those few moments will never completely leave me. I put my hands together that they never will.

So in that endeavor, I'm going to putter around with something scary:

ELEVEN THINGS YOU MAY NOT KNOW 'BOUT ME

Number 1:  Hot dogs are my love language. 

Number 2: I was in a movie with Mink Stole, Karen Black, Pleasant Gehman, Jane Wiedlin, Susan Traylor & Starina Johnson. I didn’t get a speaking part, though. Likely because I told the Director, who arrived on my doorstep (to secure my participation) early in the morning after a very late dinner party, that I wasn’t receiving unannounced guests at “this” hour. Which was not a tactic. I care more about manners than proximity to fame.

Number 3: I’ve yet to find a single morsel that can’t be improved by the addition of capers or hot sauce.

Number 4: In 2000, Coyote Ugly debuted in theaters. In 1996, as a bartender on Bourbon Street, I struck a deal with my bar back. I would dance the Macarena on top of the bar (Denim shirt/shorts and Doc Martins) to pull focus over to our side of the massive space. He would bartend. We’d split the loot. I retired in ’98.

Number 5: I wrote a book about cheeseburgers.

Number 6: I was abused as a child, and as a teenager. Assaulted as an adult. And have absorbed multiple traumatic bodily injuries throughout my life. When you pair the emotional abuse with the physical trauma, I’m not entirely sure how I survived at all. But I am profoundly aware of being protected by a source that is greater than myself. That being said… I have also had some success treating my own PTSD and no longer suffer from the more debilitating side effects of that illness.

Number 7: I did not finish College. But my friend Betty Sweet once looked at me and said "Ashley, a MORON can graduate from college." So, instead of pining for what I don’t have, I learned to celebrate the vast trove of valuable skills getting this far has bestowed upon me.

Number 8: I fully staffed the first Macon Film Festival in under 24 hours. We called it MaGa. So there are more than a few sentimental tees I’ll never wear in public again.

Number 9: I once attended “Pleasure Boot Camp” at Kripalu in the Berkshires. It was hosted by Regina Thomashauer who wrote Mama Gena’s Owner’s & Operator’s Guide to Men. I organized a semi-unauthorized Lake break-in (our homework was to bend the rules), late night skinny dip, clothing-optional hike (most of us tied our garments into a turban), and tea circle around a fire we made with the New York Times + hairspray. It earned me a title from my kindreds: The Martha Stewart of Bad Girls.

Number 10: I know more 90’s hip hop lyrics by heart than you do. So if you’re lookin’ to lose … you know where to find me podnah.

Number 11: I’m a judge at the Forest Heights Blueberry Festival Cook-off next weekend - 5/31. Who’s coming to see us???

I hope you enjoyed the round-up! Now you know.